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Now, I think things would have to change because although I still live in the same house that I have been living at since birth, I was confronted earlier by my grandmother to take responsibility and be helpful at home. Maybe because she cannot move anymore like she used to because of her illness. And my Aunt is blaming her for raising me up like this (lazy, bum, very dependent, irresponsible, immature... basically, u-n-r-e-l-i-a-b-l-e). But you know, I love how my Nanay raised me. I love how she used to wake me up everyday when I was still going to school. I love how she used to scream my name everytime she wakes me up but after 10 minutes or so, I am still on bed :) I love it when she tells me to eat even if I keep on telling her that I am not hungry. I love it when she used to make up my bed. I love it when she cleans up the room even if I tell her not to. I love it when she tells me to eat with her even if I told her that I just had eaten. I love her way of telling me to leave the dishes alone because she knows I am tired studying/working all day. I love her babying me all the time. Although sometimes, I am annoyed of her "paulit-ulit-ulit-ulit" reminders to do this, eat that, take vitamins, put on slippers, etc etc., I love her with all my heart. Maybe she is guilty of not teaching us.. not teaching me how to properly do the laundry, cook sinigang or even adobo, be lady enough to sweep the floor of my own room, how to save money, I do not blame her. I do not blame them. I just know that did it for love. It's their way of letting us feel that they love us very much, they want to take all the pain and all the hardships as much as they could. And now that I am all grown up, I do not know how to cook, I do not hate them for that. I do not even dislike them for raising me up like this.
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Just thinking about doing a lot of things terrifies me. I think I will pass out, lose consciousness or something. But I have to do this. Maybe it is also His way of preparing me of a life without Nanay soon, I dunno. Maybe this is gonna be my short and instant training on how to live an independent life. (Although I should have done this way before). Well, I also think I should start learning to do house chores if I am thinking of settling down soon. I don't want Happy starving to death while I am just watching TV (or maybe doing my coloring book), dow'want Happy stink because he had been wearing the same set of clothes for the whole week. I do not want that for my family.
Okay... Okay... I am just a bit emotional about this. It is going to be a big move for me to accept that I am now an adult. And being an adult, I have to do my own laundry starting this week.
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