Why am I so lucky to have this person in my life? Thank You for her :)
See, I have my college bestfriend, Aileen but she is living in Singapore for years now. On her absence, lucky, I have one more spare here :)
Although I see myself as the flag she does not want to raise, she always always proves me wrong. She has never let me feel that she is ashamed to have me as her friend. I love the feeling of having someone help me pick up myself when I am having a hard time bending down. And even if I would never be as good as her, I know that I would always want to be there for her with His help, be honest to her, make her smile, let her know that, although junky and worthless, I am willing to be a friend to her just as she is to me.
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To you Nena, my dear friend: Cheers men! haha matyu nga! minamaiyag mo go! matyuuuu haha wag nga na nga magmomost ng manrama ha mlag mooooooooooo hahaha
It never crossed my mind at all That's what I tell myself What we had has come and gone You're better off with someone else
It's for the best I know it is but I see you Sometimes I try to hide what I feel inside And I turn around, you're with him now I just can't figure it out
Tell me why you're so hard to forget Don't remind me, I'm not over it Tell me why I can't seem to face the truth I'm just a little too not over you, not over you
Aren't memories supposed to fade? What's wrong with my heart? Shake it off, let it go Didn't think it'd be this hard
Should be strong, movin' on but I see you Sometimes I try to hide what I feel inside And I turn around, you're with him now I just can't figure it out
Tell me why you're so hard to forget Don't remind me, I'm not over it Tell me why I can't seem to face the truth I'm just a little too not over you
Maybe I regret everything I said No way to take it all back, yeah Now I'm on my own, how I let you go I'll never understand I'll never understand!
Tell me why you're so hard to forget Don't remind me, I'm not over it Tell me why I can't seem to face the truth I'm just a little too not over you
Tell me why you're so hard to forget Don't remind me, I'm not over it Tell me why I can't seem to face the truth And I really don't know what to do I'm just a little too not over you, not over you
I don't get it! Everyday at work, I am wearing a 3-inch high heel - shoes and I do not feel any pain. Why in the world do my hips hurt now when I just wore my 2-inch wedges for 2 hours? It's not like I walked a hundred miles with it. I walked for a while, yes, but not too much.
I was editing some photos when I realized that most of my pictures look similar: me wearing different white tops and plates (and/or food) in front of me. Why????? Tell me, please! Oh why??? haha
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And here are others with different colors of clothes ;p but still with food :))
I was supposed to meet friends tonight and use my dinner cocktail reservation at Pan Pacific Manila. But you know, people are so busy doing everything all at the same time, so to sum it up, I had to find other people to use my reservation instead of cancelling it on last minute. When I had my Nanay accept my invitation, my "very good" friend (I am being sarcastic at that point) called me up to only to tell me that she can now go dine with me. But sorry to say, I had to turn her down this time (haha). At around 5:30PM, we, Nanay, Tatay, Tito Ode and me, left and reached the hotel right on time at 6PM. Here are some pictures taken earlier:
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At 6PM, we started getting food from the buffet table. Sun is still up that time. I took a picture of my spilling plate. I am very happy with the prawns, mussels and the chewy squid! I love seafood. Good timing :) ...and you can also see here 4 pieces of Fita biscuits (haha) with the strong-smelly bleu cheese (which actually tastes moldy and rotten). Some veggie sticks with white garlic sauce and salsa. The white sauce and salsa should have been nacho dips but I wrongly spread them over the vegetables. Just so you know, the taste did not go well. So do not try that at home, ayt? :D ... And some maki over there. The maki rolls score five star for me. Tito Ode and I went back to the table thrice to get more maki. And the small saucer just above the mussels, that's an appetizer, something like a hash brown topped with carrot and turnip coleslaw. -hef-ty-eat-er- :))
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Nanay here :) I put a lot of olives on her plate and baby onions thinking that she might like it but she kept on spitting 'em out. So ended up eating the olives instead. ...See her right arm on cast and the sling? I put on a shawl over her dress to keep her warm and to cover her arm. Anyway, she is enjoying her carrot juice on this picture :)
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That's Tito Ode on blue and Tatay is moving so he is blurry.
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Sun set already on this picture. Can't see the city view on the full glass window though :( I only have my celfone to take some shots here. No digicam :( Anyway, this is me posing just as my Uncle says so.
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Weirdo uncle / photo director said to stand behind the magazine table and smile ;p
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Am makin' the first move *raise one eye brow and... grin*
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chowing down the remaining "tahong" hehe walang patawad! (raw version)
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chowing down the remaining "tahong" hehe walang patawad! (edited version)
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This is the appetizers, cheese and vegetable sticks center table. Food is almost gone here :D
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Hist turn to strike a pose.
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Tatay, Ellay and Nanay - after meal :)
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Nay, sleepy huh?
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We're in the elevator. Nanay does not want to stay in the middle because she still believes in the superstition that if you take picture of three, the person in the middle is the first one who is going to die. So.... I stayed in the middle. Haha
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See!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Nanay is still right there! haha
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Sweet :)
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Just outside the lobby, I still keep on taking pictures. Nanay is moving away because she is supposed to be in the middle. Now, you see me harassing and hurting my grandfather (haha) just for Nanay to stay anywhere but in the middle.
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Look at my charming Tatay :) Now you know why I am like this!
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This is my Facebook's primary picture. Caption says:
I ambush invited my grandparents to have a simple dinner cocktails at our hotel. I am so happy that they did not turn down my invitation :) I even had my uncle come, too! :) This is taken before we leave the place: my beautiful Nanay, my funny Tatay and me. Priceless :) June 27, 2011 - Pan Pacific Manila
Heaven bent to take my hand And lead me through the fire Be the long awaited answer To a long and painful fight
Truth be told I've tried my best But somewhere along the way I got caught up in all there was to offer And the cost was so much more than I could bear
Though I've tried, I've fallen... I have sunk so low I have messed up Better I should know So don't come round here And tell me I told you so...
We all begin with good intent Love was raw and young We believed that we could change ourselves The past could be undone But we carry on our backs the burden Time always reveals The lonely light of morning The wound that would not heal It's the bitter taste of losing everything That I have held so dear.
I've fallen... I have sunk so low I have messed up Better I should know So don't come round here And tell me I told you so...
Heaven bent to take my hand Nowhere left to turn I'm lost to those I thought were friends To everyone I know Oh they turned their heads embarassed Pretend that they don't see But it's one missed step You'll slip before you know it And there doesn't seem a way to be redeemed
Though I've tried, I've fallen... I have sunk so low I have messed up Better I should know So don't come round here And tell me I told you so...
Alam mo yung feeling na malungkot ung loob mo, parang hinahabol mo yung hininga mo tas yung amoy na parang naiiyak ka, gustong tumulo ng luha mo pero di ka pwedeng umiyak kasi madaming tao? Ako alam ko. Ganun kasi ako ngayon eh. Parang andaming sinisigaw ng puso ko. Kaso hindi ko masyadong maintindihan pero ang alam ko, malungkot - ung puso ko... atsaka ako. Malungkot kami. Pero may mga ganitong oras lang talaga ako. Sigurado naman ako na aalis din to mga bukas o kaya sa makalawa. Ang hirap lang kasi bigla bigla na lang ako dinadalaw ng lungkot.
Hinihintay ko yung panahon na hindi na ako makakaramdam ng ganito. Sana maabutan ko pa.
There is a saying that "The best way to find out if you can trust somebody is to trust them." But I am not sure if I could be able to dare myself do that this time. I mean, trusting again - trusting again the things I have and things I feel. I am not sure if I could put my guards down after all that I had gone thru in the name of love. I only have so much left. I cannot let anybody take it away from me.
At the same time, it is difficult to deny that I do want to fall in love again. And to love means giving someone the power to hurt you but trusting them not to. That is the very reason why I am scared. Because last time love hit me, I was hit hard and I was all wrecked... all messed up.
I dunno... the feeling is confusing and I do not want to burden myself with such emotions. I got important things to do. So, I guess I will just go with the flow, not pushing hard because if it is meant to be, it will happen. We will see.
Someone asked me, the other day, that if I could change five things about my life, what would I change? My answer: nothing. this is who I am, who I'm meant to be. I love being me; even when I'm feeling crappy and I hate myself I wouldn't change a thing.---punkyfairydude
this question has been running in my mind for years now. sometimes, i wud say no. sometimes yes. i have reasons. let's say for the "no, i wont do it again", it's because the life that i am living now is hard and complicated than the life i used to know and used to have. before, i do not think too much. i do not worry too much. life was a breeze then. it was more comfortable than now. no, i wont do it again so i wont have to be troubled by things that surround me.
..but then, sometimes, i'd say "yes, i wud do it again". not because i am too stubborn that i want to hurt the people around me but because thru my mistakes, i learned to stand up by myself, i learned to appreciate things, i realized that life is never an easy thing. i need to sow so i can reap. i need to invest so i can earn. if i wudnt have gone thru what i did, for sure, i wud remain stagnant.
of course, my life now is complicated and i cant have everything i want unless i work hard for it. but then again, i deserve everything that i am having now. be it sweet or be it painful.
i just want to thank God for keeping up with me all thru these years.
so, wud i do it again? yes, i would. because it made me cherish even the simplest things in life. yes, i would. im sorry but yes. no offense but i would do it again.
"There are moments when i wish i could roll back the clock and take all the sadness away, but i have a feeling that if i did, the joy would be gone as well. So i take the memories as they come, accepting them all, letting them guide me whenever i can."— Nicholas Sparks
Chest to chest Nose to nose Palm to palm We were always just that close Wrist to wrist Toe to toe Lips that felt just like the inside of a rose So, how come when I reach out my finger It feels like more than distance between us
In this California king bed We're ten thousand miles apart I've been California wishing on these stars For your heart for me My California king
Eye to eye Cheek to cheek Side by side You were sleeping next to me Arm in arm Dusk to dawn With the curtains drawn And a little last night on these sheets So, how come when I reach out my fingers It seems like more than distance between us
In this California king bed
We're ten thousand miles apart I've been California wishing on these stars For your heart for me My California king
Just when I felt like giving up on us You turned around and gave me one last touch That made everything feel better And even then my eyes got wetter So confused wanna ask you if you love me But I don't wanna seem so weak Maybe I've been California dreaming
In this California king bed We're ten thousand miles apart I've been California wishing on these stars For your heart for me My California king My California King
In this California king bed We're ten thousand miles apart I've been California wishing on these stars For your heart for me My California king
I've been wishing on a star but I never could have imagined I would land just where you are after all this lonesome travelling Took one look in your eye, reached out to hold your hand This is when I realized what I could never understand
Do you want to be my one and only love? Do you want to be my one and only love?
So you wanna be my friend, so you wanna be my lover With you I do confess I can't be one without the other That was hard for me to say, I hope I said it right Which ever, come what may, you see I need to know tonight
Do you want to be my one and only love? Do you want to be my one and only love?
Do you want to play these cards, do you want to lay them down? Do you want to run away or do you want to stick around?
Do you want to be my one and only love? Do you want to be my one and only love?
I was raised by my maternal grandmother and grew up without any having any father figure to look up to except for some caring and plenty of belt-hitting / physical discipline from my grandfather. But real I-will-look-after-you spirit of a father, nah, I did not have that.
When I was 11, my mother re-married and she gave us a step father to depend on. He has always been kind and supportive to us. I am very thankful to have him even til now. I remember first time I gave him a "kind of" expensive watch, he was showing off and big talking about "his daughter" who gave him the watch that he was wearing. I was very touched. It felt good knowing he regards me as "his daughter" although we are really not related to each other. But even so, I grew up not really close to him because they live away from us. I mean my mom, he and my youngest brother: they live in Japan.
Being taken care by my Nanay, when not at home, I was being taken care by somebody else, my Kuya. We grew up together and we grew up very close. Even before he got married, we were sharing the same room! He is looking after me, buying me something to eat, making me laugh and telling me funny stories, giving me money, surprising me with slippers, book, movie to watch and other stuff when he got back from work, I am comfortable telling him things that bother me and confuse me. He has always been the one who's walking after me, watching my back and protecting me. Although there are inevitable times that we fight over crappy things, other than that, he never want me hurting and crying. In the absence of a father, God gave me my brother to constantly keep an eye on me. Because you see, I am needy and very dependent.
Lastly but not the least, my respect and admiration to the Preacher that God has let me know and have in this lifetime, Bro. Eli Soriano. He is not just a leader to the brethrens but a man of a good example that man can be a righteous follower of His words.
I do not usually celebrate Father's Day but today, I want to join the world in taking off hat to these great fathers in my life. My Papa, my Kuya and my Brother Eli. God bless you and all the good fathers in the world!
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This is Miro's Happy Father's Day greetings to his Daddy, my Kuya :)
grabbed from http://www.maryjaneseye.blogspot.com/ Posted by mjzl
I hate to see your heart broken in the end. I know you'll be stubborn until you get there and feel all the pain.I see so much things that aren't right at all but your feelings just keep you handicapped to do something about them. I want to control you, tell you where to go, but love is not about taking charge of someone's life at all.I have never loved someone so much as to set them free. I want to tell you that you are going the wrong way but that would just defeat the purpose of letting someone grow and find himself. Always have, always will. Never have I fallen so hard in-love and chose to love responsibly.
I won't talk I won't breathe I won't move till you finally see that you belong with me
you might think I don't look but deep inside in the corner of my mind I'm attatched to you mmmm
I'm weak it's true cause I'm afraid to know the answer do you want me too? cause my heart keeps falling faster
[chorus] I've waited all my life to cross this line to the only thing thats true so I will not hide i'ts time to try anything to be with you all my life I've waited this is true
you don't know what you do everytime you walk into the room I'm afraid to move
I'm weak it's true I'm just scared to know the ending do you see me too? do you even know you meant me!
[Chorus] I've waited all my life to cross this line to the only thing thats true so I will not hide its time to try anything to be with you all my life I've waited this is true
I know when I go I'll be on my way to you the way that's true
[chorus] I've waited all my life to cross this line to the only thing thats true so I will not hide its time to try anything to be with you all my life I've waited this is true
Ayala, Makati - Last time I had someone here for a date, it left me with bitter-sour memories. (that freak! Haha) Now, I came here to meet one of my grade 6 classmates. I brought the pictures I am keeping all through these years and showed 'em to him. We had a quick quick quick dinner and short exchange of stories, mostly those old funny stories when we were younger. But then he had to leave right away because of work. I thought we're gonna dig in together the coffee and the doughnuts he brought but I ended up doing it alone. But it's all right. I enjoyed the meet up, anyway. And ahmmm.. Yah, he left me palpitating and my heart beating one beat faster. I guess because of the black coffee?
Next meet up on Saturday with the rest of the gang - my grade 6 classmates. *wink*
Today is my 8th day of resting from work since I got my right eye infected. I am already fine but doctor advised me to rest more and I would finally be back to work on Friday. Okay. Whatever you say, Doc.
I already entertained and bored myself over and over for the last days. I dunno, I got nothing more left to do. For the first time, I am gonna say that I am sick and tired of bumming around. I want to go back to work :(
Yesterday, I went out for a while and when I came back home, I found my family flipping through the old, ignored, dusty photo albums - together. They were laughing at the pictures while recalling when and where the crimes, I mean, the events happened.
My Xs' and younglove-sweet love's pictures were also there which is kind of weird because I just laughed it out when I saw our photographs. We were young and babyish and budding little bunch of kiddos in love. And I am talking about 90's pictures! My Elementary school days, highschool and college moments. My Kuya's "pasts" as well haha And my mom & stepdad's loving photos.. Nanay and Tatay were younger on the pictures that we were laughing/looking at. Then, we suddenly missed our deceased Aunt who was very blooming on the photos we were browsing but then we laughed again after seeing the next pages of the old albums - baby pictures of my goofy cousins!
It's fun to recall the old times, once in a while. It's even more fun seeing the new generation listen while we tell them that this was you, you were this fat when you were a baby, you used to smile like this before, and hear them sounding amazed looking at themselves. Even more fun when all you can muse over are funny, happy and good memories from the past.
After seeing the pictures, I couldn't help the urge to (FB) message Paul and tell him what my family were doing. I was explaining to him some of the pictures that were taken when we were on our 6th grade blah blah. And he still remembers. I find it cute. So cute, I posted pics on my FB wall haha. And now, I keep on clicking his profile on Facebook. Now, what?! Look what happened! Hahaha.
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Paul used to be the apple of my (young and innocent) eye. Those times, oldies say it's not yet love... just puppy love, whatever it is, that's him. My charming puppy love hahabarkbark (however, he's into some one else that time so... ouch there you go!)
HERE ARE SOME OF THE PICTURES I AM TALKING ABOUT:
This was taken on March 1994. I invited over some of my Grade 6 classmates. My mom prepared good food for my 12th birthday and elementary graduation celebration. That is Paul beside me. Standing behind is Norizel (forgot the last name), the one carrying my baby brother is Angelo, the one with the black face on the right's my cousin's baby sitter and Albert the boy leaning on the door.
Same day... this was taken at the front yard of our house. We used to have this big space in front of our house. The baby on my lap is Shouta (my half japanese brother). He was just 2 or 3 years old at that time.
Again, Paul and me. haha I am still thinking if I look cute or funny.
At Villamor Airbase during our field trip - est. 1994
This is one of the first pictures I took with my Christian brethrens. 2001
This is me with Dingdong Dantes when he shoot SOP's dance segment at PATTS College of Aeronautics. I think this was on 2000 or something.
My college best friends. Aileen and Betchay. We were young and restless.
Full of partying that time haha
When I was in College, I joined the school publication. This was the whole staff in our bonding get away. I forgot where. Somewhere in Laguna, Im not sure. This was year 2000. I loved them. I found real brothers and sisters in them.
So, this is one of the funny pictures of me carrying Shouta on his 1st birthday. I looked like an abnormal, malnourish, mouse-ear skeleton. Plus, my brother is drooling. Perfect! -1992
One of those rare moments in our family: my mom, Shouta and Eugene (my Fil-Am cousin) in Manila. This was taken at Baywalk when it was still lively with all the bands and bars. I forgot when?.. maybe 2005 or 2006? -ish?
2005/2006: My Japanese Language Class. When I said MY, I meant I taught Japanese Language. And they were my students :) Yes, college. Teaching. No kidding... School? ask me!
More students!!!! haha
Cousins, Nanay, Tita Jane and Kuya
My Elementary Graduation Day. I dunno what else to say. Hahaha
Kuya at Pulse Disco! Whoa! How's that?! Ever heard of that? haha
This is me with all the blonde hair and cutie little flat smile there.
Kuya, as ever, my big bro, taking care of me and driving me around CCP. I cannot recall this moment so I think this was on 1986 or earlier. Kind of.
Ellay, Dan (our first cousin), and Kuya MM
Yah-ams! That's me and again, Kuya.
My Kuya. His son looks like this, too! haha
Mommy, pregnant with Shouta :) -1991
This was taken in Japan when we had a short stay there. -1995
My first communion. 1990-1991? I forgot
Shouta. Who would have thought he'd joined the army after 19 years when this shot was made?
He's more likely to join a dance troupe based on this photo haha. peace, bro!
My Mom: on her wedding day :)
Believe it or not, this is my eldest brother. i dunno what happened.
My stepfather's parents. Japan Vacation. 2000/2001?
Shouta and Papa. They are doing some confidential stuff there so don't ask more.
My cousin, Ryan, kuya, me and my childhood bestfriend, Siobe :) I look stupid here. -1993
Kuya's elementary graudation day. You are so gwapo! haha -1993
Nanay and kuya :)
Oh yah, this is me and mommy pinning on my 2nd honor ribbon haha. The guy on the left, that's Joey. He got the first honor. (whatever! hahajk)-1994 -Grade 6